Consequences

For every action there is a re-action. A consequence. Whether good or bad. As a child and young adult this would always take me by surprise. Really,why is this terrible thing happening to me!

Now as a more mature adult, I realize that life is really made up of moments. One moment to the next. Unfortunately for me, it's been a lot of stress and not always good moments. However, the small good moments are pretty great and if I wrote those down, I bet they would outweigh the bad stuff. Just the bad stuff is so heavy, makes it hard to see the good stuff.

So due to some stuff that my hubby has done we are currently in a lot of financial problems. And recently having to make the decision to quit renting the apartment we have had the past year. This apartment has been my security blanket. But money is so tight and with just my income and him not working, it's just too much.

Our lease is done in July. We are moving back to the house. Our house is currently in litagation, my husband is trying to keep it. We are close to losing it because we got so far behind. We went into foreclosure almost two years ago. The past year we've been renting and he's been trying to keep the house. We are not close to anything happening. Our friend has been living in the house for us as he needed a place to stay. And nothing has happened so for a while, we are going to move back. Catch our breath. Save some money, pay off debts.

On the one hand it will be nice to catch up. On the other, I hate that we are living in so much uncertainty. Any day, we may need to move again and then what? I could move home with my parents but then my hubby can't come. This would tear the kids apart. Be hard on them, hard on me. And screw up three kids in schools. One of which is in a college program next year. Ugh.

So for now I am choosing to move home. I will cross one bridge at a time. And hopefully get back on our feet again. This landlord has been really cool. Maybe he will let us come back if we need to in a few months?

So here's to the next moment, may it be a better one.